As we near the 5-month mark of this pandemic, everyone’s stress levels are at a tipping point. Whether you’re preparing to for back to school, reeling from a job-loss or continuing to have symptoms of Covid (a group nicknamed long-haulers) everyone is affected in one way or another, and it’s taking a toll both mental and physically.

Stress effects the entire mind and body. Adrenaline starts pumping, blood flows into the extremities and the breath gets shallow. The mind, reacting as if there is actual danger, is preparing you for fight or flight. We are only meant to be in this state for short periods of time. When we are chronically stressed our health and wellbeing suffer effecting everything from sleep to digestion to our immune response.With this level of stress and uncertainty, making time for selfcare is not a luxury anymore. It’s a necessity.

Today, I'm sharing an exercise I use when feel the effects of stress. It takes me from the fight or flight state to the rest and digest state in just minutes. It’s a guided meditation called paired muscle relaxation, a DBT skill that can dramatically reduce stress with regular practice. It’s simple and can be done anywhere. 

Tense, muscle groups noticing the feeling of tension. Exhale. Say the word relaxed to yourself. As you relax the muscles, noticing the feeling of letting go. When you first tense muscles before relaxing them, your muscles release more deeply than with relaxing alone. If your mind drifts away during this meditation gently, bring yourself back to my voice without judgment. 

TO BEGIN PAIRED MUSCLE RELAXATION

Loosen tight clothing, sit or lay in a comfortable position with legs uncrossed, close your eyes and take a few long slow, deep breaths. 

Inhale. Make fists with both hands and pull fists up on the wrists. Exhale and relax. 

Inhale. Make fists and bend both arms up to touch your shoulders. Exhale and relax. 

Inhale. Pull both shoulders up to your ears. Exhale and relax. 

Inhale, Pull eyebrows, close together. Wrinkle your forehead. Exhale and relax. 

Inhale. Shut eyes, tightly. Exhale and relax. 

Inhale. Scrunch up your nose. Bring your upper lips and cheeks up toward your eyes. Exhale and relax. Inhale. Press your lips together. Bring the edges of your lips back toward your ears. Exhale and relax. Inhale. Put your teeth together and your tongue pushing up on the upper mouth. Exhale and relax.

Inhale. Push your head back on the chair, floor or bed or push your chin down towards your chest. Exhale and relax. 

Take a deep breath and hold it. Exhale and relax. 

Inhale. Arch your back and bring your shoulder blades together. Exhale and relax. 

Inhale. Hold your stomach in tightly. Exhale and relax. 

Inhale and tighten your glutes and your hips. Exhale and relax. 

Inhale. Put your legs out and tense your thighs. Exhale and relax. 

Inhale. With your legs out, point your toes down. Exhale and relax. 

Inhale. With your legs out point your toes together. Heels out toes curled under. Exhale and relax. 

Inhale and tense all of your muscle groups. Exhale and relax.

Now take a few slow, long, deep breaths. And when you're ready, open your eyes and return your focus to the room. 

Remember this exercise is most effective when practiced regularly, time might be tight right now. Still it's imperative to take time for selfcare. It doesn't just feel good. It's good for you. You owe it to yourself and your loved ones. 

An audio version of this post is also available in my podcast A Therapist Takes Her Own Advice. If you connected with what you read here and you want to work with me, send me a message through my contact page. You don’t have to suffer in silence.